(Chelsea Update would like to thank Kristin Krarup-Joyce, Ed. S. NCSP, Ellen Kent, Ed. S. NCSP and Emily Verbeke, Ed. S. NCSP for the information in this weekly column. If you have a question for one of the school psychologists, please email [email protected]. All information will be kept confidential.)
How many times have you told your child to appreciate the good things in life and to say “thank you?”
Probably a lot.
Well, the field of positive psychology is interested in gratitude and its beneficial effects on well-being. In fact, research has shown that people who experience gratitude have:
- more positive emotions, such as joy, love, and happiness
- have fewer negative emotions, such as bitterness, envy, and resentment
- have increased feelings of connectedness and improved relationships
- experience greater satisfaction with school and improved academic achievement
- and even have better physical health than people who don’t take the time to notice and appreciate the good things in their lives.
Parents can help their children develop the attitude of gratitude through a variety of simple acts and activities. The Fishful ThinkingSM initiative is designed to equip parents with the tools they need to raise happy, resilient children and helping their children to feel and express gratitude is an important part of that effort.
Simple Gratitude Every Day
Model practicing gratitude. Emotions are contagious. Express thanks to your families, friends,
neighbors, and strangers, and ensure that your children see you behaving gratefully.
Encourage “gratitude” thinking. For example, if your child wins the spelling bee, help her identify all those who helped along the way. Suggest she say “thank you” in person or by writing a note to someone who made a particular difference.
Share gratitude daily. Make time in the morning or at dinner for the family to share at least one thing for which each person is grateful. This can be balanced with one thing that was difficult that day, but starting with gratefulness reinforces positive connections and resources.
Reinforce grateful behavior. Watch for grateful behavior or language in your child. Identify it when it happens and reinforce him for it. For example: “That was thoughtful of you to thank your friend for helping you with homework. Good for you. I’m sure it made him feel good and made your friendship stronger.”
Use visual reminders. Put notes in your child’s lunchbox reminding her to be thankful for her health, sibling, dog, etc. Text your child and remind her to count her blessings. Share something for which you are grateful.
(These tips are from “Fostering an Attitude of Gratitude: Tips for Parents” from Communiqué Handout: November 2009, Volume 38, Number 31. Communiqué is the newspaper of the National Association of School Psychologists)
